HR burnout: how HR professionals destroy themselves and their organizations

Today, HR is struggling with systemic overload, invisible expectations, and its own internal patterns. The mental state of Hungarian HR professionals is critical, with many already on the verge of burnout or well beyond it, according to a presentation of the recently published HR Mental Heaéth Index 2025 research results at an event last week. (The figures have already been presented in our previous article.)

"Compensatory self-deception": when HR starts working against its own values

Anikó Pethő, HR consultant and headhunter, talked about how HR professionals slip into hidden self-deception when they unconsciously form false beliefs in order to maintain a positive self-image or reduce internal tension. According to her, most HR professionals begin to compensate when the gap between the organization's expectations and their own internal standards becomes too wide. This is when a rift develops between their personal and professional self-image -and the wider the gap, the faster they approach burnout.

The expert identifies four typical compensation patterns that HR professionals use to try to mask organizational tensions:

1. Rationalization – providing economic or "data-based" explanations for decisions (such as layoffs) that they actually disagree with.

2. Overcompensation – intense, often exaggerated loyalty and "goodness," such as organizing large-scale events or being constantly available even when it violates their boundaries.

3. Over-identification with the organization – when HR tries to represent only the corporate values posted on the wall instead of their own values (even if those values only exist on paper).

4. Alienation – when HR professionals are essentially role-playing: they go to work, perform their duties, but in the meantime, they become completely detached from themselves.

According to Anikó, this not only damages individual well-being, but also has an impact at the organizational level. "Double talk" undermines trust among employees. Due to self-deception, HR professionals cannot see the real problems clearly and do not provide credible feedback to management. Other members of the organization also adopt the pattern of "feigned loyalty." All of this can trigger waves of resignations, distort the culture, and cause business losses.

"Leaders must recognize tension and create a safe environment where teams can talk openly about dilemmas."

The expert emphasized that in recent years, many HR managers have left their jobs precisely because of conflicts of values, and this trend has been ongoing since 2022. In addition to economic uncertainty, internal conflicts are also intensifying when HR professionals have to represent decisions with which they cannot identify.

According to Anikó, the solution lies in raising awareness of values and protecting professional integrity. HR professionals need to know which internal values they will not compromise on – and they need to stay as close to these as possible. Transparency is also important: in addition to positive communication, difficulties must also be addressed, otherwise the credibility of HR will be damaged. Ethical decision-making training and mentoring support can help find the solution. This is not only about individual well-being, but also about ensuring that when HR professionals leave the labor market, their professional credibility remains intact, emphasized Anikó Pethő.

Why is the pressure increasing, and how can we break free from it?

According to László Nagy, former HR director at B+N Referencia Zrt., the HR profession has been on the front line in recent years, and this has fundamentally changed the way it operates. The pressure is objective: turnover, layoffs, AI, constant rule changes, generational differences. However, the other half of the burden comes from within, from the way HR traditionally operates.

"HR has ingrained patterns that, intentionally or unintentionally, accelerate burnout," he said. These include excessive responsibility, a caring attitude, automatically taking on problems, and a lack of boundaries. Many HR professionals chose the profession because they enjoy working with people—but in a corporate environment, this can easily become a trap if someone does not set boundaries.

The lack of visibility and the sandwich situation - caught between management and employees - further increases the pressure. HR does a lot of invisible work that is difficult to quantify or monetize, so it often doesn't even reach the management's threshold.

What can HR do at the organizational level?

According to László Nagy, the position of HR is different in every company, but it is possible to influence culture from anywhere—just not in the same way. The key is storytelling and internal marketing. "We need to learn to talk about problems in a way that keeps management's attention," he said. HR professionals should form an alliance with marketing and repackage their messages: not as complaints, but as business impacts.

Wellbeing programs, education, and experience days—while important—are often just symptomatic treatments. The real problem lies in culture, leadership, and excessive emotional expectations. It is important to educate leaders, conduct regular screening, and recognize situations early on.

What can HR professionals do individually?

• According to László Nagy, the first step is self-awareness: "knowing what nourishes me, what drains me, in which situations I am afraid, and in which I am a gladiator." This map provides the basis for how to structure your day or even your career path.

• Setting boundaries is essential. It is also essential that HR professionals do not try to solve all the emotional problems of the organization on their own.

• It is also important for HR professionals to consciously work on their own mental health: they do not necessarily have to go to therapy or coaching, but they do need to devote time and energy to mental maintenance.

• Instead of excessive perfectionism and maximalism, László believes it is worth following the principle of "less is more": setting realistic goals of 5-10% improvement and not suddenly turning everything upside down.

Let us be aware that the subconscious mind controls us

Coach and consultant Péter Dara's presentation was a kind of call to HR professionals: they can only represent others if they first understand their own mental functioning. He pointed out that high motivation can mask overload, which is why burnout often becomes apparent later in those who particularly love their work.

He cited data from a 2024 study he led: 77% of 1,250 managers said they make conscious decisions. Péter Dara emphasized that the bad news is that this is not the case; 99% of our decisions are made unconsciously. We are guided by our habits, patterns, and ingrained behaviors. HR is no exception. In fact, HR professionals are often so preoccupied with the workings of others that they have no energy left for themselves.

According to Dara, many HR professionals fall victim to their own strengths, such as empathy. "I can sense the other person's vibrations, I know what they need—but I can no longer sense myself. My own talent leads to overload." That is why it is important to recognize that strengths can become traps when overused.

In our fast-paced world, it is increasingly common to "think after the fact, when we should be thinking first." The lack of pause leads to people no longer functioning consciously at work after noon and passing on bad patterns. A single incompetent leader can ruin many people. It would be the role of HR to signal that there is a problem, but to do so, they would first need to be aware of their own values and tools.

"Thinking requires mental strength, and we use up most of our mental energy at work. When our mental energy runs out, our animal instincts take over and we start acting on impulse—most often at home, when we have no reserves left."

Who is responsible for burnout? Without knowing our own values, limits, and decisions, we cannot expect change. At the same time, if the organizational environment is no longer what HR professionals "agreed to," then this must be recognized and decisions made in light of this.

Do salespeople pay more attention to themselves than HR professionals?

While research shows that 94% of HR professionals would participate in a wellbeing program, only 15% attend therapy or coaching. "A salesperson is more likely to pay for their own training than an HR professional. Credibility begins with taking care of our own mental state."

Péter Dara highlighted four key steps without which HR professionals (and managers) are sure to burn out:

1. Setting boundaries, planning: what is my job and what is not? What can I fit into a day?

2. Life outside of work: have something to look forward to when you go home.

3. Clarifying responsibilities: what is mine and what is theirs?

4. Systemic vision: HR's job is to match people and systems.

The anatomy of HR burnout

Behind the results of the HR Mental Index lies a profession that operates under constant overload, as burnout expert Csilla Csillag-Csatlós pointed out at the event. The central message of her presentation was that if HR professionals are not well, then the organization cannot function well either. We expect HR professionals to provide mental support, empathize with colleagues, make good decisions, and perform quality selection—all while a significant number of them are themselves burned out.

"Why do people go into HR in the first place? Because they think they like people. But burned-out HR professionals no longer like people."

Burnout test: worsening trend, clinical symptoms

The results of the burnout questionnaire completed at the event, which is based on clinical psychological tools, paint an alarming picture: in 2025, the average number of yes answers in Hungary will be 10, compared to 7.5 last year. A score above 6 is considered the diagnostic threshold for burnout.

Burnout is not only emotional exhaustion, but also a serious set of physical symptoms that often have been present for 1-2 years before HR professionals recognize them:

• persistent sleep disorders (late falling asleep or early waking up – the "classic" burnout phenomenon)

• hormonal disorders, thyroid problems, infertility

• migraines, IBS, constant pain (shoulders, back)

• cynicism, rigidity, apathy

• social withdrawal, deterioration of relationships

The phenomenon of collective burnout also occurs: a single burnt-out person can drag down the entire team, and conversely, if that person recovers, the team regains its energy.

"Burnout is not caused by others - we cause it ourselves."

Csilla emphasized that ultimately, it is not managers or the environment that are responsible for burnout, but the affected person's lack of boundaries and self-management skills. Burnout cannot be remedied by rest - a sabbatical often makes the situation worse because thoughts continue to spin. The conditions for change are:

• becoming aware of how we function

• clarifying our values (most HR professionals cannot answer this question either)

• recognizing what truly fulfills us

• establishing routines and systems in our daily lives

What is the way out? – Practical advice for HR professionals

1. Blocked work – no multitasking, the basis of effective work is segmentation. According to research, it takes 12–23 minutes after each interruption for a person to get back into deep work – the office door should be open, but also closed.

2. No laptop use in the evening – the first weekly "mandatory" task in Csilla's coaching sessions.

3. Digital silence – no notifications on your phone.

4. Leave one-third of your calendar empty – you need space for unexpected tasks.

5. Minimalist digital environment – delete unnecessary apps, use screens consciously, mute notifications, check emails at consciously chosen times.

6. Conscious relaxation – every HR professional should know what recharges them: walking, sports, dogs, silence, or even looking at shoes – it doesn't matter, as long as it's effective.

"Once you've reached rock bottom, throw away the shovel."

Csilla issued a special warning: when you're burnt out, you shouldn't rush into an uncertain change. The job market is tough, and if you move on while in a bad mental state, the same problems can easily recur in your new job. First, you need to stabilize your own functioning, and only then can you make a change. At the same time, in a toxic situation where we have tried everything – even with an incompetent manager who is not open to feedback – we should not stay in it for the sake of self-preservation in the long run, she emphasized.

According to Csilla, the labor market will not get any easier in the coming period: HR professionals will continue to have to operate at a brutal pace, with constant waves of expectations and shrinking resources. That is why it is even more important now that no one tries to deal with all this alone. Sharing information and experiences, honest conversations, professional cooperation, and communities provide the support that can give us real strength in the face of this pressure.

The original article in Hungarian can be read here.